This is an open letter to the young ladies on match.com.

I’m single.  This doesn’t bother me much, so I don’t do much to correct the situation.  I live in a small town, I hate to travel, and I am very much a geek.  Sports, nascar, religion, prime time tv…I can deal with all of this, but much prefer a good book or a decent video game, or even, god forbid, spending time with my small but high quality group of friends.  You know, people who don’t care that I don’t do stupid stuff.  So I am single.

Every once in a while, I get the urge to have female companionship of the heart.  Share feelings.  Cuddle.  Watch romantic comedies.  Small town, all my friends are married or male.  So I turn to match.com, eharmony, etc.  And you are there.

No, not just once, but every time.  I start dating, I date for a while, it fizzles, I take some time off.  Several months later, I try again.  I’m getting better at the dating thing, by the way, and some day might even get it right.  But I check to see if there are any new people on, and I see…you.  Again.  Or rather, still.  It’s been…years, for some of you.

You seem to be attractive.  Yes, I know pictures tend to lie on these places, but even so.  Most of you have a decent education, decent jobs, decent lives.  Your profiles are well written, and filled with things that make even me take notice.  Oh, and men outnumber you, sometimes 4 to 1.  And you are still there, updating your profiles, changing your pics to more recent ones, still looking.

I’ve had some good times with people I met from match.com.  Had some great relationships.  Met some wonderful people, who are all now married to other people who aren’t me.  The system does work, if you work at it.

What’s wrong?  What are you doing?  Are you too picky?  Are you waiting for the bolt of lightening?  Are you waiting for the deep pockets?  Or are you just looking, with no intention of ever buying?  I wonder, because I’ve winked and emailed some of you, and never received a reply.  Not even a polite “not interested”.  And yet, you are still there, month after month, year after year.  Why?

It’s not just one person.  There is a large group of you.  Maybe you don’t know what you want.  Maybe you do know, and it is completely unattainable.  Maybe you just log in in a moment of loneliness.  Maybe you just think very short term, not thinking long term.  Maybe you aren’t real people at all, but fakes put in to make men believe they have a chance at dating.

I wonder, and would truly love to know.